Preaching About Sex
If you preach the whole counsel of God, you're eventually going to preach about sex. It comes up pretty early and often.
That should not be perceived as a problem to be dreaded but as a privilege as we teach God's people. But, let's be honest, more than a few ships have run aground on these shores. There have been some recent high-profile examples of preaching on sex that run the gamut from unwise to unhelpful.
So, how should talk about sex from the pulpit? Here are my thoughts, but I'd love to get counsel from other guys (especially as I come up on Proverbs 5-7):
- I'm comfortable being pretty frank about these things. The Bible contains a lot of stories about and warnings against some serious sexual misconduct. I am personally fine with being frank; in fact the church needs us to be honest about these things.
- On the other hand, some people will have different levels of comfort with the use of certain terms. Usually people with children between 9-14 years old are particularly sensitive to ideas being put in their kids' heads. As a pastor I want to love those people and care for them well, even if I can't identify with their concerns. So I assume that I am going to have to speak sensitively and euphemistically at some points.
- When talking about sex, we should not be graphic, crude, or casual.
- I've learned it's good to run these things by people who are more conservative/sensitive than I am. My policy going forward is to run it by the elders of our church before I go live on Sunday morning.
What would you guys add? How do we accommodate people's personal preferences without gutting the Bible of its meaning? Schmucker, you once publicly called me out for using the "M" word from the pulpit.... what's your advice?
Perhaps taken out of context, but Paul said this:
1Co 2:2 For I decided to know nothing among you except Jesus Christ and him crucified.
How do you preach about "sex" and know nothing but Christ crucified?
Posted by: Richard | Jul 16, 2009 10:51:33 PM
Richard asked- "How do you preach about 'sex' and know nothing but Christ crucified?"
1 Cor. 2:2 doesn't mean that we literally should not know anything else. I say that because if you keep reading the book, you'll find that Paul talks about a lot of other things- including sex! But in every instance his thought is always rooted, connected, flowing out of or back to, Christ and His work at Calvary. So 1 Cor. 6:12-20 is probably the best answer to your question.
Posted by: Chris | Jul 18, 2009 11:45:34 AM
Hmm, not sure what you're shooting at there, Richard, but in that same letter Paul spent two and a half chapters addressing sex.
Michael, my own opinion: Driscoll may not exactly be the guy to model in this regard -- I do think he's stepped out of bounds more than once -- but I have personally been extremely helped by him in this area. So address it with care, but don't be cowardly about it. If your church has humans in it, they need help in this as much as they need help in all areas of human sinfulness.
So back to Richard, this is how you preach sex while knowing nothing but Christ crucified: "He comes to make His blessings flow far as the curse is found."
Posted by: Nathan | Jul 21, 2009 12:28:00 AM
Paul talked about more than Christ-crucified, but Christ-crucified was the heart of his message to the Corinthians.
My take on that verse is that Paul intentionally did not "wax eloquent" in a place that loved and praised eloquence for its own sake. Rather, he centered on the grotesque "foolishness" of the cross. It's especially helpful to view that statement in context.
In answer to your question, though, I believe you could find some helpful stuff from Bethlehem's annual conference from 5 or 6 years ago - "Sex and the Supremacy of Christ."
Posted by: Kenny T | Jul 22, 2009 4:08:21 PM
How do you preach about sex and know nothing but Christ crucified? I would think Eph 5 would seem to give some direction there. On the other hand, I told Paul's comment means he only preached the gospel over and over and over again. Rather, all that he taught was tied to the gospel.
Anyway, I did short New Year's series this past January called, Resolved. Each sermon title was "Glorify God with Your..." Simply because of the massive amount of sexual sin, I felt like it should be addressed. So in one sermon, I preached from the second part of 1 Cor 6.
Usually we have no children's service, but had one that day. I encouraged parents to keep their tween/teens in service, but told them I was going to be frank, but not crude. (I even let one couple with a 10 year read my manuscript the night before so they could decide whether or not to have him in the service)
I did use the "M" word. Not because I wanted to be shocking, but because according to stats, it's very prevalent and it's a sin that begins earlier than ever. I can't see calling out fornication, homosexuality, adultery, or viewing pornography and not mast****tion as a sexual sin.
Just my 2 cents.
Posted by: John | Jul 24, 2009 9:46:26 PM
You may want to pull Michael Lawrence into this conversation, Mike. He recently (and I'm sure quite deliberately) used the "M" word in a message at CHBC on Numbers. Which of course is where you'd expect it to come up. Actually, I thought it fit well with his theme, if memory serves, of patience and waiting on God. He mentioned it in a list.
Posted by: Andrew Nichols | Aug 17, 2009 10:39:28 PM